1身体是鹤但心可是鹰
Kyon returns home from a tiring day, only to have his little sister reprimand him for leaving her alone and forcing her to play with a now-unconscious Shamisen. Once Kyon falls asleep, the SOS brigade appear in his New Year's Dream, with Koizumi, Yuki and Tsuruya appearing as Mt. Fuji, an Eggplant and a Hawk, respectively.
2嗯?长门限定?
Kyon first arrives at the clubroom, only to be deafened by Haruhi who is throwing a tantrum because she is bored, which drives away a client. Shortly thereafter, Kyon finds Yuki playing an eroge on her laptop with the volume turned up. Kyon provides her with a set of rabbit-shaped headphones to keep the 'questionable sounds' from being heard in the room. Shortly afterwards, Kyon is accosted by Ryōko Asakura who attempts to kill him, but is stopped by Yuki. Before she fully dies, she informs Kyon that there are others who will attempt to kill him besides her, only to be interrupted by an exasperated Kyon, who nonchalantly states "the butler did it".
3那只狗的名字是什么呢?
Mikuru finds the clubroom deserted, with a TV set on the table. Mikuru turns it on, to find she is the audience of a local quiz show, in which Haruhi is the host, and Kyon and Yuki are the contestants. However, Haruhi's attempts of making the quiz more local go a bit too far, resulting in Kyon being killed (then revived) by fireworks and a truck. Meanwhile, Mikuru ignores the show and instead plays with her small lion-like pet.
4阿虚、长门她、长门她…
Mikuru finds out that Yuki is viewing erotic images on her laptop, but is too embarrassed to tell what she's seen to Kyon. Several weeks go by, and several changes are noted. Kyon finds that the bookshelves in the room are being filled with video games, and Haruhi begins to notice Yuki wearing cosplay outfits. When Mikuru finds the outfits, a cosplay war breaks out. Meanwhile, Ryoko has revived herself, but in a foot-tall chibi form. Eventually, Yuki finds out, and after saving the miniature Ryoko from a hungry cat, allows her to stay with her at her apartment.
5用躲避球来决胜负吧!
The computer club challenge Haruhi to a dodgeball game in the hopes of retrieving their laptops, but Haruhi decides to play a real game of dodgeball. Her reality-altering powers allow all the players to use 100% of their abilities.
6H那种才不会让人留下深刻的印象呢!
Mikuru informs Kyon of extra outfits found on the clothes rack in the corner. When informed that they belong to Yuki, a small-scale cosplay 'war' breaks out. At the end of the day, Yuki finishes an anime series she has been following, and lends her collection to Kyon. Mikuru grows upset when she sees the lead character of the series is a maid, scaring her into thinking Kyon is into 'maid moe'. Ryoko is annoyed at how Yuki keeps putting her in baby things, although can't help but fall victim to her idea of fun.
7心跳、稍微、女生有点多的运动会
Haruhi holds a sport contest. When asked to bring 'a barrier to the heart' as part of a scavenger hunt, Kyon brings Koizumi over and tells him 'I love you', causing Haruhi to faint. Taniguchi lags behind in the events whilst Kyon gets used as a makeshift tug-of-war rope.
8我吃点豆子吧…
Haruhi holds a 'Close Encounters of the Third Kind' Spring Festival, in which she dresses Taniguchi as a demon and gives him food whilst everyone goes outside and celebrates. Yuki traps Ryoko and forces her to dress up in an outfit for Hinamatsuri.
9登场人物全部都是女仆!
Haruhi asks for ideas for a screenplay and ends up writing about otaku maid warriors with a month to live fighting to the death, which somehow leads to Kyon exploding.
10伞好厉害
After a small half-asleep scuffle with Ryoko, Yuki heads out for a Sunday morning with the SOS Brigade. Ryoko tries to clean the apartment to take her mind off things, but grows upset being stuck inside. Using an umbrella, she manages to try and leave the building (to kill Kyon and provoke a response from Haruhi, as per her original mission), only to return to the apartment when a cat hungrily eyes her.